After my body fully recovered, I finished preparing to leave for Yangsan. My condition improved fast, making the wheezing and groaning seem pointless, which put me at ease. Because being a burden to the three was something I'd hate to death. Even the doctor, who'd declared recovery would take three months at least, seemed surprised.
He added that my state had improved a lot for sure, but since there are cases where things seem to be improving like this then suddenly take a sharp turn for the worse, I should watch the prognosis carefully for a while. At the news that I was leaving, Juyeon, who'd barged in at the crack of dawn, wailed.
"Liar! You're not coming back. You're just placating me halfway because I'm a kid and then leaving."
He'd grown more attached to me than I'd expected. The saying that children grow attached far faster than adults came to mind. Stroking the back of Juyeon, who clung tight and wouldn't let go, I shook my head.
"I'll be back soon. In exchange, promise me. You got Grandfather's permission to learn kendo, so really work hard until your hyung comes back."
"..."
"Got it?"
Juyeon, with a face like a swollen, soggy dumpling, nodded with effort. Having wailed for a solid hour, the way he then coolly took off saying he couldn't miss his kindergarten perfect-attendance award was rather striking.
Park Cheol, who'd been watching the situation with keen interest from the side, chimed in. Black Tortoise people are originally clear about separating public and private.
"And what's that?"
Heemin, who'd come back with a sack slung over his shoulder, shrugged. Going closer to look inside the sack, there was a heap of corn, freshly picked from the field by the look of it, not even husked. Whether it'd been genetically modified or what, the ears of corn were each as thick as my forearm. Setting the sack on the floor, Heemin said,
"Baek Jeongwan gave it. Said to take it and eat it."
Ah, come to think of it... there was a big field behind the annex. It was probably corn harvested from there. Baek Jeongwan tending the cornfield in a straw hat came to mind. There was an image it called up.
"...Like a father who's retired at the mandatory age."
He was an opponent I'd faced in combat just days ago, but setting aside my prejudice and looking again, he was an opponent with more to learn from. The way he treated everyone without discrimination. His amiable manner of speech and his upright, proper posture. It seemed to show he wasn't just good at sports.
Honestly, in this world he was quite an odd character. Because an alpha with strong power had no need to be kind to others.
"About Jeongwan. If he could see, he'd probably fight as well as Park Cheol, right?"
At my question, Heemin dusted the dirt off his hands and shrugged.
"It wouldn't be only because of his eyes. At that level of skill, not being able to see isn't even a handicap."
"Then?"
"If a branch person jumps into the succession fight, the main house immediately checks them. Given Baek Jeongwan's personality... he probably judged that backing down himself was better than needlessly starting a family conflict."
The handicap was an excuse. He actually stepped back for political reasons.
The sight of Jeongwan conversing familiarly with Park Cheol came to mind. Like the other organizations, the Black Tortoise Clan also seemed to have invisible power struggles. Friends or not, not being on equal footing—something about it felt strange.
"Come to think of it, the Blue Dragon Clan didn't seem to have much exchange with its branches. The Black Tortoise Clan has a strong sense of treating even branches as family."
"There are people who think a branch growing larger benefits the main house too, and people who feel threatened by it instead. Chairman Cha falls into the latter."
Come to think of it... Cha Jiwon's mother was from a branch too.
The anecdote of Chairman Cha wiping out the branch side shortly after I was born was famous in this world. Because the current major figures of the Blue Dragon Clan branches were all people Chairman Cha had personally selected.
After organizing my thoughts a moment, I spoke in a sunken voice.
"He's my grandfather, but sometimes that man scares me."
"It can't be helped. Once a succession fight starts, it doesn't end until someone dies."
"Then you, Heemin... you're not interested in making it big?"
How many accomplishments have you racked up in the Blue Dragon Clan? Are you really okay with just the measly month-end bonus Chairman Cha gives? At my question, Heemin laughed softly and retorted with his chin propped on his hand.
"Do you want me to make it big, hyung?"
"You've got to get settled to some degree to get married later."
"Speaking of which, Chairman Cha keeps telling me to at least go on meetings, and I'm blowing it off."
"Absolutely don't go on any. Do it with someone you like. I'll take responsibility."
Me's one thing, but Heemin too falling as a sacrifice to a political marriage was something I couldn't stand. Heemin, who'd been gazing at me as I made bold declarations, dropped his gaze to my left hand.
"I'll take it into consideration."
"What? You really have someone? Who is it? Where'd you meet them?"
"How do you feel about shotgun situations, hyung?"
"Don't say creepy things, you brat!"
Even at my persistent questioning of who it was, Heemin maintained a calm attitude. With a reaction like that, it was my side that got impatient. Of course I trusted Lee Heemin, but Lee Heemin seemed not to trust himself, which made it worse.
At my long lecture that pleasure without responsibility is a sin, Heemin plugged his ears. As we tussled over me telling him to stop covering his ears and listen properly, our legs got tangled. The table got shoved back and the corn I'd set on it spilled clattering to the floor.
At my view suddenly flipping, I blinked slowly. Heemin, mounted on top of me, gripped my wrist hard.
"Marriage is nothing but a social agreement, isn't it."
"..."
"And if the agreement falls through, you break up."
"So you'll make a kid first because you don't want to break up?"
Seeing Heemin not answer, struck on the nose, I sighed. Heemin was mature in all things, but at times like this he looked exactly his age. In the way he couldn't restrain his roiling emotions. Sweeping back Heemin's bangs, I spoke in a calm tone.
"Doing favors, or saying nice things, isn't love. Being able to gladly embrace someone even when their opinion differs from yours—that's what I think love is, hyung."
"By that logic, the one you love has to be me."
"..."
"Isn't it?"
A voice wanting confirmation. The face of Juyeon, crying and clinging to me, came to mind. Children won't bend their position until they hear the answer they want. That trait was annoying, but it was also lovable. Because worn-out humans like me can't honestly demand what we want.
"I love you."
I opened my mouth with difficulty. Heemin's pupils, murky like sea fog laid over the horizon, wavered for an instant. It was a face that made even my insides flutter.
The hand that had gripped my wrist hard gradually loosened. This is a world where strength becomes power. But there were things that couldn't be done with strength alone.
But this is dying-of-embarrassment territory. No matter how hyung-and-dongsaeng we are, do you really have to hear I love you? When I averted my gaze with a flushed face, a smile spread across Heemin's mouth. At his neck-hugging, aegyo-filled action, I made a fed-up expression and pushed Heemin's thigh away with my foot.
"Get off."
"It feels like I've made it."
"I get it, so get off, I said."
At Heemin's playful antic of declaring he'd treat us to a celebration of his success, I forcibly held back a laugh. Once you start indulging him, there's no end to it.
Right, you can change something with strength, but you can't comfort someone. For me, what mattered more than strength was, in the end, the certainty that we hadn't changed toward each other. In a fast-changing world, the certainty that we're still the same as ever. That would become not just certainty but a comfort that lets me keep living.
"I expected it, but... he really isn't sending me off gracefully."
The thought that came the moment I heard Baek Taebeom had summoned me was this. Here it comes. On top of being indebted to him, I'd shamed Baek Jeongwan by beating him in front of the members. Even if he came charging with a Blue Dragon crescent-moon blade saying cutting off a finger or so was the only way to balance the books, I'd have nothing to say.
With a nervous face, I sat on the reception room sofa and waited for Baek Taebeom. The fist resting on my knee was damp with sweat.
Baek Taebeom is, objectively speaking, a villain. The public assessment is the same, and his air is exactly a typical villain's. Since I was already plenty on his bad side, I planned to keep as low a profile as possible at this meeting.
After waiting about ten minutes like that, the firmly shut door opened and Baek Taebeom appeared in a dobok. His grizzled hair was clearly an old man's, but because of his towering frame he didn't look like one.
I shot up and bent my back ninety degrees. Without even acknowledging my greeting, Baek Taebeom sat at the head seat and put a cigarette in his mouth. A member standing beside him immediately pulled out a lighter and lit it.
"You made all that fuss and now you're leaving for Yangsan first thing tomorrow?"
"I'm sorry."
"Omega bastards have no sense of propriety, honestly."
The hands I'd demurely gathered at my lower belly flinched. Paying no mind to Baek Taebeom's words jabbing daggers, I kept my head bowed. Even if it ran contrary to my own opinion, when you can bow, you should bow.
"I'm sorry for the discourtesy I've shown all this time. The kindness you've extended, I'll repay in some form, so—"
"And kendo."
"Yes?"
"Are you quitting it?"
I lifted my gaze, which had been on the floor all the while. The unexpected question left me speechless. Baek Taebeom, who'd been glaring at me coldly, struck the marble table with his palm. At the bang! I sucked in my breath and held it.
No matter how fearless I am, Baek Taebeom was honestly too scary. Baek Taebeom, who'd been growling like a Baekdu-daegan tiger, spoke in a sunken voice.
"Don't make me say it twice. Answer me straight."
"I-I still have matters left to resolve, so..."
"Tch, you've still got a long way to go. Below standard. You can handle the chaff, but if you meet a truly strong alpha you'll die. You'd know best."
At Baek Taebeom's words, I felt intimidated. Baek Taebeom still didn't seem to agree that an omega could beat an alpha. Swallowing dry, I nodded. Of course I know that too.
"But I don't want to give up before even fighting."
"..."
"You might find me untrustworthy, you might find me pathetic, but..."
"Baek Jeongwan!"
Before I could even finish, Baek Taebeom called out for Jeongwan resoundingly. Jeongwan, who'd been waiting behind the door, appeared. Bracing on the sofa armrest and rising, Baek Taebeom shouted irritably,
"Give him that and send the bastard off! Honestly, guys who don't know their place are the first to go acting up. Leave today, not tomorrow. I don't even want to look at your face anymore."
At the sight of Baek Taebeom's back as he swiftly turned and left the room, I bit my lower lip. The door slammed as if it'd break, and silence settled in soon after. My clasped hands trembled faintly. Now that I'd left the Blue Dragon, I had to slowly get used to this kind of door-slammed-in-your-face treatment.
To me steadying my wavering heart, Jeongwan spoke up.
"Can we talk for a moment?"
